Have you ever found yourself wondering why Yoruba people place such a high premium on respect and tradition? If you’re visiting Nigeria, marrying into a Yoruba family, or engaging in business or friendship with Yoruba people, understanding their etiquette is not just polite—it’s essential. The Yoruba are renowned for their rich heritage, and their customs are woven into every aspect of daily life, from greetings to family gatherings and social interactions.
Observing Yoruba etiquette is more than a matter of courtesy; it’s a sign of good upbringing and a bridge to mutual respect. For visitors, these customs can open doors to meaningful relationships and lasting impressions. For those marrying into Yoruba families, upholding these traditions is often seen as a mark of honor and a testament to your character. Even in business or casual dealings, knowing and practicing these etiquettes will earn you admiration and trust. Are you ready to learn the most important Yoruba etiquettes that will help you stand out for all the right reasons?
1. Prostrating (for males) and Kneeling (for females) to Greet Elders
Among the Yoruba, greeting elders is a sacred act that must be performed with utmost respect. Males are expected to prostrate fully or at least bow low, while females kneel when greeting elders, especially in family or community settings. This gesture goes beyond a simple hello; it is a public display of humility and reverence. Failing to observe this can be seen as a grave disrespect, sometimes even resulting in social sanctions or family rebuke. When visiting a Yoruba home, especially for the first time, this etiquette is usually a must. Though this has been made less compulsory as some elders are alright with a low bow as a sign of respect. It is one of the best ways to show you value their traditions and are willing to honor their elders.
2. Using the Formal Pronoun “ẹ” When Addressing Elders
Language is central to Yoruba etiquette, and using the formal pronoun “ẹ” instead of the informal “o” when speaking to elders is mandatory. This linguistic distinction is deeply ingrained and signals respect, much like the use of “vous” in French or “usted” in Spanish. Addressing an elder informally can be seen as a sign of poor upbringing or lack of cultural awareness. Whether you are asking a question, making a request, or simply conversing, always use the formal pronoun. This practice is especially important during introductions, ceremonies, or when meeting your in-laws for the first time. It is considered one of the best indicators of proper Yoruba upbringing. Adhering to this rule demonstrates your understanding of Yoruba values and your willingness to adapt.
3. Addressing Elders with Titles Like “Baba” or “Iya,” Not by Their First Name
Calling elders by their first name is considered highly disrespectful in Yoruba culture. Instead, you should use titles such as “Baba” (father), “Iya” (mother), or other honorifics that denote their status. For example, you might say “Baba Kunle” or “Iya Funke” rather than just “Kunle” or “Funke.” This etiquette extends to older siblings, aunts, uncles, and community leaders. Using the proper titles is one of the best ways to acknowledge their age, experience, and position within the family or community. It also fosters a sense of unity and respect across generations. This tradition helps maintain the social fabric and hierarchy that is central to Yoruba society.
4. Never Giving or Receiving Items with the Left Hand
In Yoruba culture, the left hand is considered improper for giving or receiving items, especially when dealing with elders or in formal situations. Using the left hand is often associated with disrespect or bad manners. Always use your right hand, or both hands if the item is large or significant. This etiquette is observed in homes, markets, ceremonies, and even in business transactions. Ignoring this rule can create an unfavorable impression, so it’s vital to remember, particularly when presenting gifts or offering food. It is a subtle but powerful way to show respect. Observing this practice consistently will help you gain the trust and admiration of Yoruba people.
5. Averting or Lowering Eye Contact When Speaking to an Elder
Direct, prolonged eye contact with elders is seen as confrontational or rude in Yoruba society. Instead, it is best to lower your gaze or avert your eyes slightly when conversing with someone older. This gesture communicates humility and deference. While Western cultures might value direct eye contact as a sign of confidence, in Yoruba settings, it’s the opposite. Adapting to this etiquette shows your willingness to embrace local norms, which is especially important when visiting Nigeria or interacting with Yoruba families. It is one of the best ways to avoid misunderstandings and show genuine respect. This practice is deeply appreciated and often expected in formal and informal interactions.
6. Greeting is Mandatory and Not Optional
Greeting is not just a formality in Yoruba culture—it is an absolute must. Failing to greet someone, especially an elder or a host, is considered a serious breach of etiquette. Greetings are expected at all times of the day, with specific phrases for morning, afternoon, and evening. Whether you’re entering a room, passing someone on the street, or joining a gathering, always offer a greeting. This simple act is one of the best ways to make a positive impression and demonstrate your respect for Yoruba values. Consistent greetings help build rapport and create a welcoming atmosphere. It is a daily ritual that reinforces social bonds and community spirit.
7. Serving Elders First at Mealtimes
During meals, it is customary to serve elders before anyone else. This etiquette is observed at home, during family gatherings, and at public events. Serving elders first is a sign of honor and gratitude for their wisdom and leadership. Younger people are expected to wait patiently until elders have been served and have started eating. This tradition reinforces the social hierarchy and ensures that respect for age is maintained at all times. If you are a guest in a Yoruba home, following this custom will endear you to your hosts. It is one of the best ways to show that you value their traditions and hierarchy.
8. Placing High Value on the Advice and Wisdom of Elders
Elders are regarded as the custodians of knowledge, tradition, and moral guidance in Yoruba society. Their advice is sought and valued in family decisions, community matters, and even personal challenges. Listening attentively and expressing appreciation for their counsel is expected. Disregarding or openly challenging an elder’s advice can be seen as arrogant or disrespectful. This etiquette is especially important when marrying into a Yoruba family, as elders often play a pivotal role in marital decisions and family harmony. Upholding this value is one of the best ways to foster harmony and unity. It reflects a deep-rooted respect for experience and wisdom.
9. Children Excusing Themselves from Adult Conversations
Yoruba children are taught from an early age to excuse themselves when adults are having a conversation. Remaining in the room or interrupting is considered rude and intrusive. This etiquette teaches children the importance of boundaries, respect, and self-control. It also allows adults to discuss sensitive matters without concern. Whether you are a child or a young adult, knowing when to leave a conversation is a mark of good upbringing and respect for elders. This practice is strictly enforced in many Yoruba homes. It is a vital part of maintaining order and respect within the family structure.
10. Offering Help to Elders Without Being Asked
In Yoruba culture, it is expected that younger people offer assistance to elders without waiting to be prompted. This can include carrying bags, running errands, or helping with household chores. Such acts are seen as demonstrations of respect, gratitude, and communal spirit. Failing to offer help can be interpreted as laziness or indifference. This etiquette is especially observed during family events, ceremonies, and in daily life, reinforcing the value of service and humility. It is one of the best ways to strengthen family ties and community relationships. Practicing this consistently will earn you a reputation for being considerate and well-mannered.
11. Upholding Family Name and Honor Through Proper Conduct
The reputation of the family is of utmost importance in Yoruba society. Every individual is expected to conduct themselves in a way that brings honor, not shame, to their family name. This includes observing all cultural etiquettes, behaving with integrity, and avoiding actions that could tarnish the family’s image. When dealing with Yoruba people, remember that your actions reflect not just on you, but on your entire family. This sense of collective responsibility is one of the best features of Yoruba culture. It motivates individuals to act with dignity and pride. Upholding the family name is a lifelong commitment that shapes every aspect of personal and public life.
12. Observing Proper Dress Codes and Cultural Traditions
Dressing appropriately is a significant aspect of Yoruba etiquette. Traditional attire is often required at ceremonies, weddings, and religious events. Even in casual settings, modesty and neatness are valued. Wearing the right clothes at the right time shows respect for the occasion and for those present. Ignoring dress codes can be seen as disrespectful or careless. Embracing Yoruba fashion and traditions is a wonderful way to show your appreciation for their culture. Proper dress is not just about appearance—it is about honoring the values and identity of the Yoruba people.
13. Not Interrupting or Talking Back to an Elder
Interrupting or talking back to an elder is a major breach of etiquette in Yoruba culture. Even if you disagree, it is best to listen quietly and respond respectfully when invited to speak. This rule applies in family settings, community meetings, and public gatherings. Practicing patience and humility when engaging with elders is one of the best ways to earn their respect and trust. It also helps to maintain harmony and order within the group. This etiquette is strictly enforced and often taught from childhood. Observing this tradition demonstrates your maturity and cultural sensitivity.
14. Bowing the Head as a Sign of Respect
Bowing the head slightly when greeting or passing an elder is a subtle but powerful gesture of respect. This practice is observed by both men and women and is often combined with verbal greetings or titles. Bowing the head shows that you recognize the elder’s authority and status. It is a simple yet effective way to communicate humility and reverence, especially in formal or ceremonial settings. This gesture is appreciated in both private and public interactions. It is one of the best ways to make a positive impression. Consistently bowing your head as a sign of respect will earn you admiration and acceptance.
15. Acknowledging Seniority in All Social Interactions
Seniority is highly respected in Yoruba society, not just in age but also in status and achievement. Always acknowledge the most senior person in the room first, whether in greetings, seating arrangements, or during conversations. This etiquette helps to maintain social order and demonstrates your understanding of Yoruba values. Failing to recognize seniority can be seen as a lack of cultural awareness or even as an insult. This practice is especially important in formal gatherings, family meetings, and community events. It is one of the best ways to show that you understand and respect Yoruba social structure. Recognizing seniority is a sign of wisdom and good upbringing.
Facts on Yoruba People
The Yoruba are one of the largest and most influential ethnic groups in Nigeria, with a population estimated at over 40 million.
Yoruba society is organized around extended families, with strong emphasis on kinship, lineage, and ancestry.
The Yoruba language is rich in proverbs, honorifics, and formal expressions that reflect their values.
Traditional religion, Christianity, and Islam coexist among the Yoruba, with many people observing a blend of beliefs and practices.
Yoruba art, music, and festivals are celebrated worldwide for their vibrancy and cultural significance.
Respect for elders and communal living are core values that shape every aspect of Yoruba life.
The Yoruba are known for their colorful attire, elaborate ceremonies, and distinctive cuisine.
Conclusion
Understanding and upholding Yoruba etiquette is more than just following rules—it’s about embracing a culture where respect, honor, and community are paramount. Whether you are visiting Nigeria, marrying a Yoruba person, or building friendships and partnerships, these etiquettes will help you navigate social situations with confidence and grace. By observing these traditions, you not only show your appreciation for Yoruba heritage but also position yourself as someone of excellent character and cultural intelligence. In every interaction, let respect and humility be your guide, and you will always be welcomed among the Yoruba.
